my last post bout leaving?
well.. i understand dat a few ppl have actually misunderstood dat i wasnt gonna blog for some time due to some reasons.. but it's actually supposed to be.. i'm leaving as in.. dun ask me out.. i wouldnt go out kinda i'm leaving.. leaving this society everyone's living in.. that's wad i actually meant.. tot i'll come clarify things a lil.. yep.. well.. this is still my blog.. i'll still maintain it.. but not as often.. i'll be back to join my friends.. some day.. someday when i have recovered from my illnesses.. or at least made significant improvement.. when i win myself over.. prob den i'll try to win other ppl over.. at de current moment.. i think i'm better off being alone.. dats how i sincerely feel.. i still love the ppl hu are sincere to me.. thou few.. but i can regconise them and i love them still.. as for the rest.. hu are just putting up a nice show.. i guess u knw hu u are.. it aint nice to spell things out.. this thing i'm suffering from has put me in a new light of life.. i believe it's a double edged sword.. but i'll live with it.. or even better still overcome it.. well.. guess i've said alot more den i'm supposed to.. anywayz.. for ppl hu are wondering.. i'm doing pretty well for my studies.. passing all my mods cept 1 and even scoring distinction for 1.. more to sae.. next time =)
ingenue
11:29 PM
i'm going awae... duno when i'll come back.. dun ask me when i'll be back.. i duno.. maybe 3 daes... maybe 3 years.. i duno.. dats all i've to sae.. goodbye..
ingenue
10:30 PM
i knw i haven been blogging for sometime.. just kept procrastinating.. well.. past few weeks was spent erm.. i cant quite rem.. but let's see.. bestie came back from bkk.. had a steamboat liquor party at my place.. my bestie enjoys talkin not onli to me but my mom! hahaha! dey share de same kinda frends.. hahaha.. met up with bestie ytd to have lunch.. talk somemore.. we love talkin.. went to buy clothes.. hahaha.. now here i m blogging while waitin for my bestie to cue me to get out of house.. haha.. i didnt really felt like blogging.. but i just had some stuff i had to write dem out..
i was watching a show ytd and dere was this intro on this new threatre performance in taiwan.. it's called shui hu zhuan.. or wad ppl call de water margin.. if u've read de original u'll knw it's bout 108 men and ya.. the things bout men.. it's quite a good storyline.. but this threatre performance is bout 9 different or was it 8.. men.. in modern day society.. i'm really quite interested in the show if u ask me.. and if i have the means i'll fly over and watch the show.. so wad happened was i got so interested in the show i went to find out the taiwan's sistic site (it's not called sistic if u're takin wad i sae as it is -.-) checked out the play and at the same time browsed thru the other plays they have.. if u guys still rem.. i mentioned about a book i had read or.. had been reading.. The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho.. it's a really inspiring book.. really good.. i recommend everyone to read it unless of cuz u're too shallow to read a book.. and guess wad.. in taiwan.. they have a play based on that book.. maktub.. dun ask me wads dat.. read de book and u'll knw.. i sooooo wanna see dat play too.. den i went to check sistic site.. the one.. WE have.. den i realise we do not have much threatreworks and those dat are ard dun really interest me that much.. so.. is it just me? or is it the art scene in singapore? ok.. i'm done complainin.. and i still wanna watch the 2 plays in taiwan badly.. hahahha... okie.. i've got my cue.. leaving home already.. gotta meet up with my cousins this evening then if time permits would proceed to devilsbar as ken is back.. dat is if time permits..
ingenue
3:16 PM
friday was spent at home doing facial drinking tea and watching tv... accompanied with pizza... haha..
sat i went to work for my aunt at vivo city... de whole dae was spent at vivo with lil joel.. such a cute lil boi he is...
sunday met up with lynn... went vivo city.. had dinner at sushi tei... was so so so full... after dinner we walked around lookin for xmas pressie.. i found something i wanted to get for bestie but dey didnt have it at dat outlet.. prob gonna try another outlet or something.. after dat we went to st james power station - dragonfly.. i dont really fancy live band but de show was not too bad.. quite entertainin with eye candies... dat excludes sylvester sim.. HAHA.. we sat around and watched a show and left around 12mn.. went down to clarke quay after dat... met up with lynn's friend benny.. a nice chap.. went to some place called geographer.. they have a thai live band dere.. and de singer is cute.. haha.. de utt kinda thai cuteness... sat around listened to music and played games all nite till they close at 5am... saw clinic c and de hed kandi bar as i was leaving clarke quay.. gonna try those 2 sometime.. interested, ms b??? =) reached home at around 5.30 bathed and while waiting for my hair to dry read my new book the alchemist.. a very nice book i would sae.. good recommendation by my therapist.. really inspiring... after this gonna read the little prince.. many have said it's boring and hard to interpret.. but still gonna try reading it..
woke up at ard 12 noon todae... switched on my pc and was talkin on msn halfway when my monitor went haywired.. it just gave way... was just thinkin of de money i have to spend on getting a new monitor when rodrick offered to gimme his brand new nv used b4 monitor lyin at some corner of his house.. haha.. lucky me.. hehe.. now i can save up my money to get something else.. haha! gonna go collect the monitor from him tml.. and gonna buy py's xmas present tml.. gonna get bestie's present on wed after my appt with my doc in de morning.. and bestie's coming back tml midnight! weeeeeee... hope she had a great time over in thailand.. i miss u!!!! =D shall we go try live band de next time? thou i dun understand thai.. de thai songs didnt sound too bad.. dey sounded quite nice in fact... shall we bring mun along so she can interpret the song and probably communicate with de cute thai singer? HAHAHA! lookin forward to bestie being back! hehe!
ingenue
8:45 PM
try
this ... quite cool.. haha
ingenue
11:09 PM
saw my therapist on tues... she saes i should exercise to give out energy or something.. cant rem wad she said exactly.. but something along that line.. so todae.. for de 1st time in many years i exercised.. for approximately an hour.. gonna exercise for ard half an hour everydae from todae onwards.. lets see if i can stick to it.. and i'm oso gonna start something.. not gonna tell u guys wad.. will let everyone knw if i succeed.. haha!
this morning i met ms b for bbf! i had bbf and she had hotcakes with sausage.. did breakfast @ mac @ je...passed her de map and de card with de massage place address on it.. she's already on de plane or probably have reached thailand already.. will onli be back on tues next wk.. will miss her loads.. after we parted ways at je.. i went to bugis.. wanted to borrow a book from de lee kong jian reference library.. turned out de book was not for loan.. so sad aint it? doh.. so i went back to bugis junction.. walked around abit.. went to
icon@bugis.. walked de whole of icon.. quite an interesting place selling interesting stuff.. dere's this shop dat sells bath and body works stuff.. really nice.. when i came out of icon it was already rainin... went back to bugis junction walked around lookin for xmas pressie.. wanted to go over to bugis village but de rain was getting so heavy i couldnt go over.. so i bought a mag and went to mos.. bought a cup of iced milk tea and sat dere reading mag while it poured outside.. left bugis ard 4+ took de train back.. and on the train i saw elaine! she's back from aussie with her other half lennie.. i tot they'll onli be back ard xmas time.. but she's back already.. such a coincidence.. i'm de 1st familiar face she's seen since she's back.. how nice.. haha.. chatted for awhile and she alighted with lennie.. continued de journey home... met mommy @ lot 1.. went shopping for some grocery.. bought cucumber for facial! haha.. den bought some facial stuff and came back.. tml will be spent @ home clearing up my backlog of work and doing some facial + tea relaxing kinda stuff...
came home and logged on msn.. pk saes he has de book the little prince.. and he's gonna go find it for me! yippee!!! hehehe.. if he finds it den i can save my money up and just buy the alchemist.. hehe.. so nice.. kakaka
i've thought over it hard and long.. i've decided to let go of all the craps that i've been true and be true to myself.. i muz learn to love myself more den anyone else and at de same time love others.. i'm not gonna subject myself to bad treatment anymore.. i'm not gonna let de ppl hu love me down.. =) to those ppl.. especially my family and ms b.. i dun wanna let u guys down anymore.. i'm gonna learn to stand up for myself and love myself just de way u wan me to..
-ms b i'm missing u already! have fun with py! hehe-
ingenue
9:46 PM
seven things that scare me
- cockroaches (+ all insects including butterflies)
- failing in life
- horror shows
- losing my loved ones (dat includes u ms b)
- being fat (which i think i am -.-)
- being ugly (i m here too.. haha)
- being alone (but i think i no longer am scared of this..)
seven things i like the most
- shopping
- travelling
- tea (green, english breakfast, earl grey and floral)
- anime, comics
- dancing (latin american, disco)
- singing
- ms b is not a thing... but i like her =D
seven important things in my room
- the eyeless pig on my bed.. haha!
- medicine
- bible
- bed
- pic of me and bestie!
- cash.. i have quite some in my room
- books??? hahahaha
seven random facts about me
- i love to read good books
- i love animes like anything
- i like cute things
- i have something for shiny gadgets
- lots of girls annoys me
- i'm bitchy i bitch with my bestie alot.. haha!
- i like pants but i look good in skirts.. o_O?
- 1 extra 1: I HATE STUPID PPL! brainless shits
seven things i plan to do before i die
- learn more languages and cultures
- travel around the world
- marry a good & rich man that loves me.. HAHA!
- take up knitting, dancing, yoga, etc.. lol!!!
- start up a business
- get a masters degree if possible a phd =\
- do charity work in places like africa (that is if i dun fall sick there 1st!)
seven things i can do
- type really fast
- bitch bout ppl.. especially stupid & useless ones
- cook! or bake...
- sms and talk at de same time (something my bestie cant do.. hehe)
- sing for long hours and lose my voice later
- talk on de phone for a long period of time (think of my occupation in de past)
- drink lots of wine and not get drunk.. (am i supposed to be proud of this??? haha!)
seven things i cant do
- maths! (something my bestie is good at!)
- act cute and innocent
- contain my anger
- go on a diet (i love food!)
- draw a circle with 1 hand and a triangle with another
- read music notes
- act as if i like someone i dislike
seven things i say the most
- dumb
- stupid
- brainless
- idiotic
- wa lao
- hahahaha
- omg
seven celeb crushes (listed below are ppl i think are cute.. i dun have crushes on dem la!)
- orlando bloom
- jesse mc cartney
- zheng yuan chang
- guo pin chao
- he jun xiang
- steven gerrard
- xabi alonso
you get the point.. dey are all boyish and cute.. i said i like cute things wad...
seven people who have to do this
- anyone's who interested.. do already tell me so dat i can see =)
this is specially done for my bestie ms b who is now on her way to thailand with her darling as requested by her.. =)
ingenue
7:17 PM
went out with ms b and py just now.. met at ard 3.30 at cityhall.. den we went to marina square and reserved a table for 3 at dian xiao er... went starbucks.. sat down drank some chocolate and talked alot.. my bestie passed me my pressie she got for me.. it's a really pretty butterfly watch dat changes in color.. hahaha.. really pretty ok???? went back raffles city to collect the lady's card den went back to marina square for dinner.. we were 50 mins late for our reservation but de nice lady still let us have de seat immediately.. we ordered duck.. toufu.. vege.. dong po rou... nice and full dinner.. and i had loads of peanuts.. haha! talked bout having kids... den we left and went to harry's @ esplanade.. bestie had a harry's 1922 was it? and i had a chardonnay.. 3 of us were kinda bored so we started telling ghost stories.. kinda freaky and bestie scared me alot of times.. -.- hahahaha.. she just suddenly screams and scare me.. hahaha.. left at ard 11??? took a cab home... really happy todae.. anytime spent with de both of dem is happy dae.. beats spending time with my other frends anydae.. sad but true.. i feel most at ease with dem... thank you ms b for giving me a wonderful bdae celebration =) i love u =)
ingenue
12:03 AM
was supposed to go out with 2 guys todae.. i shall not mention hu dey are.. dey both promised me at 1st.. den later on 1 said he had work and drinking with boss de other i guess.. plain forgotten.. well i knw work and boss is more impt... i have nothing to sae.. but it really sets me thinkin.. anywayz we were supposed to meet to have dinner to celebrate my 21st bdae.. really.. this 21st bdae of mine has shown me how much i really meant to all my friends.. de onli person hu really cared bout how i feel is my bestie.. she's de onli 1 dat remembered.. dat asked me bout celebration and all.. wad bout my other frends? those dat i care about? those dat i alwayz rem their bdae and buy dem gifts and all.. all dey did was msg me happy birthdae.. some didnt even msg me happy birthdae.. not sae i gey gao... but it really shows how much i mean to dem... i really feel hurt.. b4 my bdae.. everyone's telling me 21st is impt.. celebrate and all.. but hu really asked me bout celebration? anyone really planned a celebration for me? no.. no one cept my bestie and my family.. dats why i love my bestie.. dats why i love my family.. i used to treat my other frends like another branch of family.. i treated dem sincerely with all my heart... but dey dun even rem my bdae.. it's just nothing to dem.. i'm just a fool.. i alwayz believe how u want ppl to treat u.. treat dem de same... but i nv gotten back how i treat others.. i nv got de same sincereity and heart back from those ppl i used to love... i used to love these frends more den my own real family.. i loved these ppl with all my heart.. whenever dey wanted anything from me.. i tried my best to do it for dem.. i nv said no to dem.. but this is how dey forget me.. i'm just insignificant to dem.. even my classmate of less den 6 mths show she cared by getting me a gift with much thought.. i'm just truly disappointed.. i'm just so stupid.. i'm tearing as i'm typing this... dats cuz i still care bout those ppl.. and i care wad dey think about me.. but maybe dey just think nothing of me.. i'm tired already.. nv ask for anything when u give... but what about alwayz giving and getting nothing at all... i'm just human.. i get tired from all these too.. i dun wanna be miss goody 2 shoes anymore... cuz no 1 appreciates.. no 1 cares... my 21st bdae is my happiest and alwayz worst bdae... it's happiest cuz i spent it with my family.. ppl dat i've just learnt to love with my all... but worst cuz ppl dat i've loved for de past few years didnt care about it at all.. i've had enuff... i've seen and felt enuff... from now on.. i'm just gonna concentrate on ppl hu truly loves me.. dat includes my real family and my bestie(and her other half- dey are really really nice to me).. my family and my bestie are godsend.. dey are de best thing dat has happened to me.. i have no regrets being me.. cuz i have dem to love me.. after putting my love on de wrong ppl for de past 6 years.. i've finally learnt to love de right ppl.. and i wanna keep loving dem.. and i nv wanna lose these ppl.. i love dem..
ingenue
7:47 PM
went out for drinks with my classmate last nite.. after drinks we had supper at newton.. super spicy stingray.. think i haven had it for too long i couldnt stand de spici-ness.. after dat.. came back and threw up.. i think i'm getting old.. throwing up after a few drinks.. WEAK! hahaha.. i nv used to throw up dat easily.. well.. at least i dun cry and act like a baby after i get drunk now.. :p
haha.. wonder if tonite's still on.. better go find some hot stuff to eat.. head hurts...
ingenue
10:45 AM
