i was rummaging thru my cupboard and i found my autograph book (ok i knw dis sounds lame..) in sec sch.. and i was reading thru de messages dey left for me... and suddenly i felt really bad.. ok.. look.. i wasnt exactly de nice lil ger in sec sch.. in fact i was quite an irritant.. at least dats wad i feel... i have like.. a major attitude problem... so my frends actually wrote in de book asking me to change my attitude for my own good.. but i guess i chose to turn a deaf ear to it.. now look @ those messages.. i really feel bad.. i knw dey'll nv get to read this.. but... i'll like to sae.. sorry... i'm sorry for being such a spoilt brat... i'm sorry for not understanding... i'm sorry...
ingenue
3:43 PM
yea.. i'm sick... agn... zzzz... i duno wad on earth is wrong with me.. i'm like alwayz falling sick... alwayz feeling lethargic.... docs can onli tell me to get ample rest.. but i can slp like for de whole dae and yet feel tired... sometimes i wonder if i have some sleeping disorder -_-
went shopping with brina on fri... bought some stuff.. guess wad.. i wasnt happy... i've been feeling moody for like de past few daes and its getting worst... now i dun even feel happy going shopping... itz dat bad... but of cuz i enjoyed brina's company.. in fact i was happy to see her... itz alwayz nice to bi in de company of old friends... juz seeing dem kinda takes ur worries awae... i would not have to put on a mask in frnt of dem... i can juz bi.... me... :)
went clubbing with my classmates for de 1st time on fri... ok..... my classmates are nice... but... disorganised.. lolx.. or rather.. itz hard to bi organised.. cuz wi are all.. different.. we might bi seeing each other almost everydae... but we all have different interest... finding a place to club is tough enuff... itz not easy to find a place which accomodates to everyone.. we went chinablack in de end... believe me.. dat place sux... but well... @ least my classmates were fun... next time.... i think i'll juz op for chilling out @ chijmes....
stayed @ home de whole of sat... was already sick.. din get anything constructive done.. was supposed to go for nana's bbq... but had a fever in de evening after i woke up from my nap... i was feeling so damn sick and groggy i din have de energy to make it dwn to paya lebar.. sorry nana.. :( so sorry...
i'm gonna go read up on my sociology now.. test is on wed.. gotta study... take care guys.. i'll blog.. lata.. if i have de time.. =)
i'm still searching for u...
ingenue
1:05 PM
i duno y i alwayz feel dis way.. maybe itz due to stress or sth... i duno.. i juz feel... bad.. i feel like going over to baobei's place now... i suddenly dun wanna bi alone... suddenly.. i'm afraid of losing everything... suddenly... i feel so helpless... i need a hand... a hand to pull me out of all these... i feel like crying.. i think i'm gonna break down... i duno wads wrong.. i juz feel like dat..
ingenue
11:55 PM
hee.. okies.. i deleted all my past entries... i wanna have a new start... i knw.. i'm sorry... i haven blogged for almost a month.. but i cant help it.. my lappy wasnt ard and there was some prob with my IE... now dat my lappy is back.... i can blog all i like.. haa.. i'm so happy... :P
had my 1st test in SIM todae.. econs... bahz... luCkily baobei went thru with me my econs.. if not for baobei.. i guess i would fail my test... >.< thx baobei! wo ai si ni ler! loLX.. oh.. thx to kelvin mervyn moemoe.. lOlx.. everyone hu helped me with my econs.. everyone hu studied with me.. rofl... guess itz my dae todae... i was walkin to de cafeteria with ju and i saw my cute guy.. lOlx.. he smiled @ me.. and i was telling ju ju.. i'll definetely do well.. rofl!!! nahz.. juz bullshitting.. lol
well.. lotsa stuff happened last mth.. i can juz go on and on writing bout wad happened.. but i guess i'm not gonna do dat.. i'm juz too lazy... but oh well.. ppl close to me would knw wad happened.. so i really dun have to type it dwn.. lolx.. for ppl hu really got no idea wads going on...... i'm studying @ SIM now.. i'm SINGLE and STRAIGHT.. (dun piss me off by saying i'm crooked.. i'll most prob kill ya) i quitted my job.. i'm pissed with my boss.. and... i dun intend to wrk.. at least till my examz end.. i wanna concentrate on my studies.. and... MY CUTE BOI CUT HIS HAIR! AND HE LOOKS SO NERDY AND KIDDY! loLx... he alwayz looks kiddy la.. :P
dd juz came back frm bangkok todae.. apparently he missed his flight.. >.< he lost his hp and a shirt in bkk too.. poor dd.. -sayang- was tokin to dd bout r/s and wi both agree and de intial part of falling in love is alwayz sweet.. but subsequently it turns sour.. and i dun like it.. maybe all my past r/s makes me lose all confidence in love.. sometimes.. thinkin back.. i wonder if i really did de thing.. made de right choice... but... well.. itz my decision my choice.. i'll have no regrets... i guess i juz dun see de pt in regretting.. even if i regret.. i'll juz make myself feel more miserable cuz i cant do anything bout it..
and 1 more thing.. i'm really happier lydat.. lookin back i think i wasted too much of my time and energy on pleasing other ppl.. ppl i love.. hu dun treat me well.. hu takes me for granted.. so really.. if u tink u're life is better without me.. let me tell u sth.. my life now is great.. i really love every single moment of it.. :)
-living life to the fullest-
ingenue
9:26 PM
